almost anything is likely to happen. The release of creativity is an opportunity for the human spirit to glow until it ignites an all out blaze. That’s what happened to me in 1991. I started a company with my new partner. We needed a name for the roadside furnishings we were building from the free weed permit the DNR (Department of Natural Resources) issued us to cut from Capitol Forest outside of Olympia, Washington. I played with names for a week before one stuck. We named our twig furniture company Naturally Bent.
The next 5 years was a roller coaster ride. The furniture went around the world and we made more than a quarter of a million in wholesale orders. Mostly what I took from those years was learning about myself and my capabilities, gaining confidence and motivation. We all learned more than we could imagine about the human spirit, good and bad.
I’ll back up a bit for you. When I went missing and homeless in ‘89 I’d left my abuser, moving a few states away, returning to California with my girls. He was thankfully, not their father. On so many levels we had it easy compared to other women, whose abusers are spouses, legally attached to children.
When I left SLO it was after a year of job hunting, except for odd jobs. I was a marketing consultant, office helper, and advertising peddler. We decided to head north to Olympia, where my mom and step dad lived. She was recovering from Breast Cancer and needed help. I traded the beater sedan I was driving for an empty Dodge propane van to move a few accumulated belongings to Washington. Our plan was to make a fresh start in a place that neither of us knew and have the girls with us by Christmas. It would only be three and a half months.
It could have been an exciting time but I was falling apart at the thought of leaving the girls behind with family in Grover Beach. It was late in August 1990. I had it in my head that something would happen, and I wouldn’t see them again. It was more than fear, it was the first time in my life I knew cold dread. Not a good feeling.
When you’re living week to week, so many things can happen and usually do. When you’re homeless it’s like being a hamster on a small wheel. one small jerk of the cage and the wheel comes loose and it’s chaos. I knew it was the best alternative but my heart was ripped open. I cried most of the way to Olympia. And It did get a lot worse, before it got better.
When I’d get really into the fear the idea of them coming home to me again was all that kept me going. The realization was immediate that home is not a place, it was who you re with and family. That was another thing I learned. It wasn’t about the stuff of home, it was all about my girls being with me again. Honestly, I would not be alive or have wanted to be without my girls. I understand why women can feel justified to hide their children, knowing they’ll lose them. Coming out of the creeks would be the hardest thing a woman could do for her children, and the bravest.
Filed under: building community, creativity, homeless | Tagged: homeless mothers with children, sustainable resources
